‘It Was the Hug I had Been Wanting’: Tiffany Haddish On Moving Past Hurt to Forgive Her Mom

Tiffany Haddish has talked about the contentious relationship she had with her mother Leola, both in her memoir “The Last Black Unicorn” and in interviews. And during a recent visit to “Hollywood Unlocked,” she talked about forgiving her.

On Tuesday, Dec. 3, the actress and comedian threw a bat mitzvah ceremony on her 40th birthday in Los Angeles to honor her Jewish heritage, where she also honored her mother, who was in attendance.

Tiffany Haddish explained during a recent interview how she forgave her mother. (Photo: David Livingston/Getty Images Entertainment via Getty Images)

The ceremony took place after Haddish re-established a relationship with her father and found out he’s an an Eritrean-born Jew. She also released her new Netflix comedy special “Black Mitzvah” on the day of the ceremony.

In the past Haddish has revealed that her mother suffered a terrible car crash when the comedian was just 8 years old. As a result, she had to take care of her siblings, plus teach her mother basic functions.

The accident also left her mother with a head injury, which Haddish said made her become verbally and physically abusive. And during her interview, published on Dec. 5, the “Night School” star was asked how she was able to forgive her mom.

“It is a long road and I’m still working on it,” Haddish explained around the 10:05 mark of the interview. “But I have to put myself in her shoes. What tools did she have to be the best? Not a lot. And then when she had that car accident, everything was taken away from her and she had to rebuild.”

“Also, you got to look at it like ‘what if the tables are turned?’” she added. “What if I have children or adopt children and something happens to me and I end up not being the best that I could possibly be? Do I want them to sh-t on me for the rest of my life that I’m here on this earth or do I want them to try their best to treat me as well as they possibly can?”

Haddish also said it was always her dream to be able to take care of her mother by taking her out of the mental institution she was in and getting her the best treatment, which she’s been able to do. The “Girl’s Trip” actress purchased her a home as well.

Plus, there was one time that Haddish received the affection that she always desired from her mother, which also helped to repair their relationship.

“When I got her out the institution and she came to the show that I did at the Microsoft Theater, my sister brought her in but didn’t tell me that she was going to be there,” she recalled. “And we’re backstage and she just comes up to me and says, tears in her eyes, ‘I’m so proud of you. You were able to bring all these different people together. I’m so proud of you.’”

“I could have died right there. I was satisfied with everything right there,” she continued. “And she gave me the best hug. It was the hug I had been wanting since I was 7, 8 years old. That mama hug like ‘I got you.’ I love that lady. I can’t stand her sometimes, but I love her. That’s my first love.”

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